The Kronikle, Vol. 4, Issue 3: "If your head was small, that meant you were stupid" and Fox's Postulate
Where did we last leave off, Kronkites?
Ahhhh, I recall. I believed you received a brief update during the second day. I think it is my fourth, I don't know for sure though, because when one participates in the AP Reading, days bleed into one and the passage of time loses its meaning. Pretty sure it is the same way for long-term convicts, nursing home residents, and the committed.
Got veggie sausage today. It did not live up to the amount of effort that went in obtaining it. The orange juice tastes weird. The only time orange juice should taste weird is if it has vodka in it, and that is mostly speculation but I am pretty sure it is true.
I am dealing with a distinct lack of spinach by eating all the candy I can get my hands on.
The quote in the title is from one of the essays I scored. I took it personally.
Other classics:
"There is no reason to help a dead horse get back on its feet"
"The Irish were strongly disliked even though they brought whiskey."
"Racial splurs"
"Because of this fear, many Asian immigrants were sent to entertainment camps in the west..."
"It was almost as if the Settlers were a mother bear, the gold was her cubs, and the immigrants were hunters trying to get rich."
"They also did not complain about pay due to the fact that they couldn't speak English."
"Americans got to the point where they would use police force, even against the innocent little ones."
"Like the Asians who were proved to be 'more' smarter than the average American."
My table loosened up somewhat thereby making existence something scrutable. The question we are grading asks the student to compare the opposition to immigration during the 1840s-1850s with the 1910s-1920s. Imagine, for a moment, how the Average American (remember, there are many who are more smarter, so...), with no announced warning, might start the first paragraph to answer the question. Think..."America has always been a nation of immigrants"..."melting pot"..."'native' Americans discriminated against". OK. Good. I have now read that paragraph over 300 times in 2 days.
I decided it was a weird question. It is written in such a way so that the Chinese Exclusion Act is excluded as out of time period (it was passed in the 1880s), but the kids don't remember that so I have read the 300 paragraphs on the Chincese Exclusion Act for no good reason.
Figured out that I have a table mate who is mischievious, easily distractable, and shares a similar sense of humor. Today, he, irritated with my righteous tendency to take up all the space at the table, choose to draw a line indicating his side of the table and my side. I added a demilitarized zone. He added the first weapon. I added the first missile silo. Ultimately, a world war resulted, including sticky note escalations and playdough (courtesy of Anarchy Incarnate) aircraft carriers, with additional time devoted to the speculation of Dr. Stephen Hawkins (sp?) grading an AP Theoretical Physics exam (that got tacky and out of line very quickly) that ultimately dovetailed and finished with a reference to Dr. Who.
The guy on the other side I call the Terminator because all he does ALL day with out slowing down or getting distracted is grade at a pace that is about twice as fast me when I am focused, and I am on the fast side (hey-easy with the jokes). I think I spied him looking blankly at a wall during a break. Pretty sure he is a cyborg bent on our destruction OR placed at our table by ETS to monitor our behavior. Or both. Whatever, I know his secret and I am ready, I'm going to bring a big magnet. That always takes cyborgs down.
The two ladies at the end have developed a lovely, collaborative relationship and the lady in front of me is quiet like the Terminator. The Navy guy next to the Terminator and the quiet lady occasionally mumbles, "Jesus" as he scores the essays.
My table leader is either focusing on his essays or cutting up with us depending on his mood. Today, he brought us red, white, and blue bead necklaces so we could represent for the American (Know-Nothing Party aka No Nothing Party aka Now Nothing Party) Party. They were made in China.
I have been working on soccer after the end of the day. My roomie has a kid that is going to be in the World Cup someday, so she is able to give me some pointers. The first day we tried to find the park, we took a wrong turn and ended up in a wooded area next to an abadoned railroad trestle (think that is what they are called). I thought for a minute she was taking me to the second location. I don't know if I can take her even though I have many, many pounds on her. She's scrappy.
We went with another friend, A Boy Named Dana, who is from Florida. He cracks me up and was willing kick the soccer ball around even though he is a baseball nut and probably broke a lifelong vow. Its fine because we won't tell anybody. Its funny when he gets around Roomie's car sharer, He Who Lacks a Nickname at this Point, who is also a baseball fiend (who also broke his vow and played soccer the NEXT day). They have superlong conversations about what I think is baseball no one else can understand. But they talk with the conviction and emotion I do when I am talking about airplanes, or the police, but only in a good way.
Well, Kronkites, the 2000 candy calories I consumed today seem to have moved out of my stomach, so I am getting a little grumbly.
Until the next point in the Khronology, I remain,,,
CtR(S)
OH Yeah!!!! I almost forgot. I now have a natural law named after me. Here it is:
Fox's Postulate-The number of pages of your essay should never exceed the score I am willing to give it.
Ahhhh, I recall. I believed you received a brief update during the second day. I think it is my fourth, I don't know for sure though, because when one participates in the AP Reading, days bleed into one and the passage of time loses its meaning. Pretty sure it is the same way for long-term convicts, nursing home residents, and the committed.
Got veggie sausage today. It did not live up to the amount of effort that went in obtaining it. The orange juice tastes weird. The only time orange juice should taste weird is if it has vodka in it, and that is mostly speculation but I am pretty sure it is true.
I am dealing with a distinct lack of spinach by eating all the candy I can get my hands on.
The quote in the title is from one of the essays I scored. I took it personally.
Other classics:
"There is no reason to help a dead horse get back on its feet"
"The Irish were strongly disliked even though they brought whiskey."
"Racial splurs"
"Because of this fear, many Asian immigrants were sent to entertainment camps in the west..."
"It was almost as if the Settlers were a mother bear, the gold was her cubs, and the immigrants were hunters trying to get rich."
"They also did not complain about pay due to the fact that they couldn't speak English."
"Americans got to the point where they would use police force, even against the innocent little ones."
"Like the Asians who were proved to be 'more' smarter than the average American."
My table loosened up somewhat thereby making existence something scrutable. The question we are grading asks the student to compare the opposition to immigration during the 1840s-1850s with the 1910s-1920s. Imagine, for a moment, how the Average American (remember, there are many who are more smarter, so...), with no announced warning, might start the first paragraph to answer the question. Think..."America has always been a nation of immigrants"..."melting pot"..."'native' Americans discriminated against". OK. Good. I have now read that paragraph over 300 times in 2 days.
I decided it was a weird question. It is written in such a way so that the Chinese Exclusion Act is excluded as out of time period (it was passed in the 1880s), but the kids don't remember that so I have read the 300 paragraphs on the Chincese Exclusion Act for no good reason.
Figured out that I have a table mate who is mischievious, easily distractable, and shares a similar sense of humor. Today, he, irritated with my righteous tendency to take up all the space at the table, choose to draw a line indicating his side of the table and my side. I added a demilitarized zone. He added the first weapon. I added the first missile silo. Ultimately, a world war resulted, including sticky note escalations and playdough (courtesy of Anarchy Incarnate) aircraft carriers, with additional time devoted to the speculation of Dr. Stephen Hawkins (sp?) grading an AP Theoretical Physics exam (that got tacky and out of line very quickly) that ultimately dovetailed and finished with a reference to Dr. Who.
The guy on the other side I call the Terminator because all he does ALL day with out slowing down or getting distracted is grade at a pace that is about twice as fast me when I am focused, and I am on the fast side (hey-easy with the jokes). I think I spied him looking blankly at a wall during a break. Pretty sure he is a cyborg bent on our destruction OR placed at our table by ETS to monitor our behavior. Or both. Whatever, I know his secret and I am ready, I'm going to bring a big magnet. That always takes cyborgs down.
The two ladies at the end have developed a lovely, collaborative relationship and the lady in front of me is quiet like the Terminator. The Navy guy next to the Terminator and the quiet lady occasionally mumbles, "Jesus" as he scores the essays.
My table leader is either focusing on his essays or cutting up with us depending on his mood. Today, he brought us red, white, and blue bead necklaces so we could represent for the American (Know-Nothing Party aka No Nothing Party aka Now Nothing Party) Party. They were made in China.
I have been working on soccer after the end of the day. My roomie has a kid that is going to be in the World Cup someday, so she is able to give me some pointers. The first day we tried to find the park, we took a wrong turn and ended up in a wooded area next to an abadoned railroad trestle (think that is what they are called). I thought for a minute she was taking me to the second location. I don't know if I can take her even though I have many, many pounds on her. She's scrappy.
We went with another friend, A Boy Named Dana, who is from Florida. He cracks me up and was willing kick the soccer ball around even though he is a baseball nut and probably broke a lifelong vow. Its fine because we won't tell anybody. Its funny when he gets around Roomie's car sharer, He Who Lacks a Nickname at this Point, who is also a baseball fiend (who also broke his vow and played soccer the NEXT day). They have superlong conversations about what I think is baseball no one else can understand. But they talk with the conviction and emotion I do when I am talking about airplanes, or the police, but only in a good way.
Well, Kronkites, the 2000 candy calories I consumed today seem to have moved out of my stomach, so I am getting a little grumbly.
Until the next point in the Khronology, I remain,,,
CtR(S)
OH Yeah!!!! I almost forgot. I now have a natural law named after me. Here it is:
Fox's Postulate-The number of pages of your essay should never exceed the score I am willing to give it.